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When I wanna get drunk, get my vision blurry
No time for tiny beers, cause I’m in a hurry
I need the biggest can you got behind the bar
I need a master cylinder of PBR
The beer that placed first in 1893
By God, that makes it good enough for me
They serve it in bottles and three kinds of cans
But there’s only one size you’ll hear me demand

Master cylinder
Master cylinder
Master cylinder
Don’t want no pretender
Need a master cylinder

24 ounces is not a lot of beer
For a man like me who doesn’t know fear
I shotgun it down in one big swallow
For you amateur drinkers that’s a hard act to follow
I like drinking liquor; it suits me just fine
I got no problem with a nice glass of wine
But there’s only one thing that'll quench my thirst
The beer I mentioned in the very first verse


Pabst Blue Ribbon is my favorite kind of brew
Whenever I drink I have more than a few
In a silver can, red and blue logo
It’s the beer that taught me to drink like a pro
One day I’m gonna take the brewery tour
And see how they make this beer that I adore
When I get there I’m gonna run down the hall
Find the master cylinders and drink them all



from Live - Coup D'é Ta​-​Ta's, released January 15, 2008
Music and Lyrics by Attractive Eighties Women
Recorded and mixed by Joel Mullis at Fatback Sound Studio
Produced by Joel Mullis and Attractive Eighties Women




Attractive Eighties Women Atlanta

Attractive Eighties Women sound like a cross between Molly Hatchet and an eighth grade talent show.

“Like Andy Kaufman meets the ‘Mats at the dog end of a three-day amphetamine-fueled performance art bender." - Chad Radford

"Like a tornado of two-hundred Led Zeppelins, out-of-control and bearing down on a South Georgia trailer park." - Kilgore Trout

"Them boys are swampwise." - Okefenokee Joe
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